None of us are going to brag about allowing self-pity to invade our lives, but for some reason, from time to time, we find ourselves right in the middle of a pity party we are throwing for ourselves? Why do I do that???
Basically - it's the same reason I give into any craving or temptation ...because it gives me short term pleasure. Self pity allows me to tell a story that makes my suffering noble instead of optional. My suffering makes me someone special instead of someone who is CHOOSING to think thoughts that make me feel bummed out. I'm releasing myself from the responsibility of being in charge of my mind.
I get to lower others expectations of me, I get to lower my expectations of myself, I get to feel special for suffering, and I get to avoid fear. Buuuut ...I'm trading my FREEDOM from the obligation to feel negatively about the circumstances of my life.
So what's the other option? It's to OWN my circumstances and show up the best I can WITHOUT making excuses, WITHOUT explaining why life is harder for me than everyone else, WITHOUT self-pity. Will people possibly judge that I am less capable that I really am? ...it's possible, it really could happen, but that's OK because it is OK for people to be wrong about me.
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